Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Making the Most of Visiting Day

Like many parents we are eagerly awaiting our first visiting day with our daughter at camp. After not seeing her for nearly 3 weeks, we imagine her broad smile as she catches a glimpse of me and my husband walking into camp and her racing beneath the pine trees arms outstretched to give us both a big hug around the neck. Ah, the sweetness of daydreams.

I still clearly remember the first time my parents visited me after 3 ½ weeks at camp. I wasn’t all smiles and joy, eager to share with them every moment of my leisurely days by the lake. I felt awkward introducing them to my friends and even felt like they were trespassing on my turf.

We need to remember that we are the foreigners on visiting day. Despite the fact that we raised them, helped them with homework, drove them to countless soccer matches and gymnastics meets, we may as well be just another viewer in the crowd at the Fourth of July parade for all of the attention our campers may chose to lavish upon us when we show up at ‘their’ camps. And make no mistake; it is theirs—their home, their friends, their place, their independence.

Some campers may run up and give mom or dad or grandpa a big hug and eagerly begin storytelling. However, an equal number may sit back and timidly acknowledge us as parents before running off for a game of tetherball without so much as a backward glance.

What to do?

Be Patient 
If your camper is reticent to hang out with you, be patient. Give her time to adjust to your presence in her place.


Be Present 
You have a great opportunity to get a feel for the place he is living. Be observant, meet his counselor, talk with the director, look around camp.


Be Pleased 
One of the benefits of summer camp is the opportunity for a child to gain independence. If your child isn’t running into your arms to ask you to wash her bathing suit or what she should do because her flashlight isn’t working , then perhaps she is starting to gain self-reliance.


Be Positive 
When he is ready to hang out with you, listen to the stories he has to share without judgment. Let your child be comfortable that your visit won’t upset his equilibrium. Take in all that he wants to share.

Our daydreams may not materialize on visiting day, but with patience and a positive outlook we can leave our visit content that our child is soaking up the essence of summer camp.